The moon is full, ripe and witchy as hell tonight. This is a mother moon, all full moon’s are mother moon’s and this month the mother moon is ruled by the deep, esoteric, taboo busting, secretive, dark seeking Scorpio.
A Scorpio mother is a fiercely loyal and devoted mother, she dives deeply into the souls of her children and focuses on transforming all that is not in alignment with their highest good and producing whole, magical, powerful beings to go out into the world. That is what tonight’s moon promises to do for us tonight, to transform our hearts and our feminine selves into radiant powerful beings at their best.
This deeply, heavy mother moon comes busting into the sky right after the sun cycles under the pleasure seeking, romantic, serene, earthy sign of Taurus. Just when we get ready to relax, to take it slow and to enjoy the comforts of this realm for a while now that spring is fully sprung, her opposite sign comes into the night sky and illuminates our emotional bodies, calling us to transform, to dive deep and to face any shadowy aspects within ourselves that need to be transmuted into light and wholeness.
Astrologer Coach Sonja Francis hit the nail on the head for me this month with her full moon youtube post, I was all the happier to find out that I could email her to receive a copy of all of her full moon questions, questions that will be relevant for the next two weeks, you can listen to her video here: https://youtu.be/L5O4PHPcZzU
The part that resonated with most with me in Sonja’s video was when she discussed how the opposing signs of Scorpio and Taurus complete each other. My sun sign is in Scorpio and my Moon is in Taurus, so I walk with the lesson of balancing these opposing signs, I experience them opposite of how they are appearing today, so that’s a lot of balance for me.
The big lesson I’m taking with this opposition, is transforming attachment to security and uncovering one’s passion. This rang so true for me. For years I was all passion, if I wasn’t passionate about it I didn’t do it. I fell in love passionately, I made art passionately, I read passionately. I had very little attachment to security because I was all longing.
When I began walking the path of grace, I was astonished and overwhelmed by how blessed I became, grace brought my desires to fruition, I found passionate love, passionate space to express my art and my service as a Priestess. I became a mother, mothering became a new passion of mine, a whole new level of fulfillment and devotion sprung up within me. All that I was passionate became fulfilled and all that I had been passionate about had to do with my true heart’s desire, my heart is ruled by Taurus. Each time my heart was fulfilled the Taurus energy of my heart was lit and life became romantic, sensual, comforting and pretty, as the energy of my heart increased some of that Taurus energy began to go to the extreme until the subject of security began to blaze within my heart so brightly that I became overly attached to earthly security and comfort.
I didn’t want to loose my clients, my husband, my daughter, I wanted us to be comfortable, to not struggle to have a steady flow of ever increasing abundance coming in. Suddenly I was earth bound, focused on the comforts that this realm could offer us as a family, if only we could get our piece of the pie and get a big enough slice. The days of living by grace, of surrender, of flowing and diving deep to transform the fears that tempted me to act out were long behind me as I began to act on fears and grasp for life to stop spinning and to just stay still, to blanket my family in comfort, certainty, abundance and simplicity.
Some of these desires were passions and they were good, we took steps to simplify our life, to slow down and to spend more time together as a family. As grace unfolded opportunities for this, I watched amazed as we were provided for every step of the way. But, but, but….that nagging Taurus moon of mine, I wanted more, more assurance that the grace wasn’t going to run out, more numbers in the bank account, more working hours for my husband, and this insatiable appetite was born. When I slowed down to ask myself what it was all for, what the purpose of the striving and the control was for the answer was chillingly insane. I wanted more security, money and work so that I could have more peace, simplicity and time with family, things that I already had, it was as if I thought I had to maintain the grace, I had to ensure it didn’t run out, rather than enjoying the life that I was being afforded I was doing everything to create the opposite of what I had, which was what I wanted, so that I wouldn’t loose what I had, but it was my fear based acting that was erasing what I had!
All of this came to a head as the moon became full in the sky. I was relieved to learn that we had a Scorpio Mother Moon with us tonight, it gave me hope that the intensity of this loop I’ve been caught in was the moon calling upon my Scorpio soul to do some transformative work.
This month on the blog in the Journey with the Crystals section, the crystal we are working with is Dioptase, a crystal of the heart. I’ve been contemplating living from my heart, my Taurus heart, and how this would look. Ever since our move a year ago we have been getting rooted, settled and I have not been myself fully, I have been so much in the Taurus shadow. But what would it look like to live from a full and sweet elevated Taurus heart?
My husband just began his season back at work and that very same week was called away to attend to a family emergency 12 hours away. This was an opportunity to act from the heart and not from fear, to support him to go and to be with his family and to turn over the finances to grace. I would say I got a C+ on how we walked through this together. A few days earlier my spiritual advisor had advised me to get clear about my fears around security and finances and to make sure that I find a way to ensure that they not be attached to my husband’s earnings, “because he’s not going to be fully back into steady work until you’ve worked through this.” “Sure, sure,” I thought as he got the call to go back to work two days after that talk, and then three days later called away to attend family business. Seems she was right, there will be no steady stream until I get rid of the notion that my supply comes from him, rather than from grace.
So here I sit, contemplating grace, contemplating what lies beyond the human realm of finances, remembering what it was like to allow grace to unfold my journey and how she fulfilled all of my needs and never debted me or made my life drabby or unpleasant. I’m at the precipice , prepared to jump back into the capable hands of grace, except this time when I jump, it’s with a toddler in my arms and a babe in my womb, I’m jumping into grace with my children and I’m taking a leap into faith that grace will provide for me as a mother, that grace will mother through me and that grace will provide for my family.
I am spent. I am exhausted from trying to “arrange life to suit my needs,” as the text in the Big Book writes, I am done looking to my husband to be a God and ready to walk as conscious equal partners with him out into the mystery. I am ready to live from my soul’s Scorpio purpose and to be balanced by the romantic, sweet, pleasurable nature of my heart.
I give up, you take it Mother. I am yours. I am ready to walk as You dictate I walk, I am ready to surrender, I am ready to be mothered and to have You mother through me. Thank You for Your blessings, and thank You for maintaining them without my help. I am Your child, I remember now, I don’t need to do it all. Thank You for this journey.
What would it look like if we all returned to the Mother tonight, if we all trusted that She knew best and if we just surrendered to Her and allowed Her to work Her magic though us? Because She will if we invite Her, She will if we will allow Her. Let’s journey together tonight and walk under the light of Her moon and give our lives back to Her, shall we?
Grace Be With You,
Priestess of Grace,
Candise Soaring Butterfly
image taken from: https://ralphiesportal.files.wordpress.com/2012/05/full-moon-witches.jpg
Tonight is another Mother Moon, the Mother Moon is the full moon, and tonight she is under the astrological sign of Scorpio.
A Mother Moon extends, she balances, she is full up and she brings fullness and fertility into our lives. The Mother Moon calls on us to balance out our emotional life, this month the Mother Moon is ruled by Scorpio the planet of death, transformation and rebirth, she is opposing the Taurus Sun that is fuelling us with the energy of birth, renewal and beginnings.
This moon is big for me, to begin with the moon and the sun are in exact opposition of what my personal chart is, I’m a Scorpio Sun Goddess with a Taurus Moon. These past few Crone and Mother Moons have been about finding harmony and balance for me within my chart and continue to be so as the sun and moon dance to the opposite beat of my personal sun and moon.
Tonight it is all being pulled at the seams, the old that has died away for me is literally rising up from the ashes, I just returned to the house of my childhood, toddler, husband and uhaul in tow. The sun is our life force, the energy that fuels our life’s purpose and my scorpio sun had sworn that I would never return to this place to live, ever. It has been so very true for me that whenever I say never in life I am proven wrong.
Somehow in the course of the past 10 months the call to move and then eventually to move right back to where I had run so far from became clear. My Taurus Moon, the part of me that rules my emotions and craves stability, roots and security was pulling me to move to the countryside, to prepare and set the foundation for the vision that I have for our growing family of living off the land and homeschooling. This type of living wasn’t sustainable in the big busy city I had lived in over the past 10 years and there is nowhere quite like where I grew up for affordable living and open countryside.
It took a lot of deep seeking within to confirm that this was the course I was prepared to walk, for the beginning steps have landed us back in the home that was once wrought with conflict for me. It takes a lot for a scorpio to forget.There has been much healing over the years between my extended family and I, my daughter is in love with them and so with the inner nudge and the external desire for closer family and simpler living we began to prepare for our pilgrimage.
The past two weeks were insane, packing up our home, my husband driving across the country and my daughter and I living in a basement for a week and then flying to our new home.
Last night when we arrived we went down to my childhood bedroom and found that my husband had set it up in our magical, Waldorf, butterfly Priestess personal style, the icing on the cake was the wall length family bed that he had created with three mattresses for us. I sighed a sigh of relief and I knew that in the very least this cove will be my sanctuary for now.
The Mother Moon is calling to me in a big way right now. All that was missed in being transformed while I have been away is being called the the surface. Whatever old emotional patterns that I have had with my family are rising from the ashes to be blown away. I am downstairs, writing as I do every night while my husband takes my daughter out, I did not explain this decision to my parents. I am not apologizing for taking time for myself, apologizing for resting, relaxing, explaining why my daughter is vegan or why we pray to the Divine Mother. I am not debating or talking over. I am a Priestess, a Mother, a Wife and I answer to the One Goddess within, that is it. That is the new way that I am showing up in my family system.
The Taurus energy of the sun and my personal moon is balancing this transformative time out for me as I begin anew, I look to fresh starts. I watch as my parents engage my daughter in a new way, a way that only the wisdom of years past could offer. I watch as I rediscover the land of my childhood, appreciating what I once took for granted. And I branch out into the future of what it is that we will grow in this upcoming year, where we will settle, how we will grow together as a family.
This Scorpio Mother Moon is the wesak moon, the moon that the Buddha is reported as having been born under, he is said to have been the first enlightened being ever. What a powerful time to begin and end a phase of my life. What better place to practice stepping into enlightenment then with the system that had conditioned me. From big city living far from my roots to small rural life surrounded by the roots that grew me. I am home.
I call upon the Scorpio Mother energy to hold me tight, to give me strength as I resurrect what I thought was dead and breathe new life into what has been left to live again. To all of my sisters and brothers gathering under the light of the moon tonight, breathe deep, dig deep and enlighten that which was buried as dead, some things never fully die away.
Grace Be with You,
Priestess of Grace,
Candise Soaring Butterflly
image taken from: http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-zijUyeVjUvw/U3FSP3RNclI/AAAAAAAADtA/MV-C8yTmBJ0/s1600/wesak+buddha.jpg