It is so soothing to be taking this time to check in for the Leo Crone moon. I missed the Capricorn Mother Moon post as I was away on vacation for my brother’s wedding. Like every other month, the Mother Moon is the moon that I shed my blood on, I had a light release this month, though the week leading up to the Mother Moon felt full and charged with tension for me.
Now that I am settling back into our shared home and getting into a routine with my Maiden I feel as though the tensions are melting away. As I’ve mentioned in previous posts the Crone Moon (New Moon) is the phase of the moon that women used to all bleed with, this phase of the moon empties our wombs and connects us together as women. With the introduction of electrical light, chemical birth control and electronics of many forms our bodies lost the pure link with the moon’s cycle and we now cycle at different times of the month. There is a beautiful magic that still exists when a group of women live together or spend a lot of time together that links each woman’s cycle together, perhaps some of you have a few sisters, mothers or aunties that you share a moon cycle with.
Regardless of our personal cycle, the Crone Moon is still a time when our energetic womb space sheds all of the accumulated energy of the prior month that we are ready or willing to release. This moon phase is one where we as women are energetically depleted and it is the perfect time for us to slow down, to pamper ourselves, to gather in circle with other women, and to receive the wisdom of our elders as we once did within the red tents. Each Crone Moon is influenced by the astrological sign that she falls under, this month’s influence is the Leo Goddess Archetype.
Leo energy and I are like oil and water….or perhaps more aptly put fire and water 😉 I am a water sign through and through and the intensity, the extroversion, the loudness of the Leo roar, the heat! all of it has felt so uncomfortable and irritating to me for such a long time. So much so that I used to find myself avoiding Leo women all together as I found their presence to be too overwhelming and showy. It was not without much good humour that I learnt that the first Priestess that mentored me is a Leo, I adore this woman and am in contact with her today. As her and I worked together I spent a month relating to the elements, one week for each element, the week of fire I resisted. I just did not resonate with the fire element. Since my walk with the fire element during that week of intention my experience of all things fire has shifted.
I began to enjoy the summer season, a season that felt too high energy and blinding to me in the past. I began to meet more and more Leo women that just charmed me right out of my introverted shell. I began to admire the full bellied, untamed laughter that came from these regal women’s bellies. I related to the fierce loyalty that they exude (Scorpio’s are loyal to their death), I remembered their essence of wildness as one that I once knew in my Maiden years, their unapologetic presence in a room as they shone as brightly as they could became a real source of inspiration and elevation for me.
That being said, the past Lion’s Gate Stargate that just opened was intense for me, it brought forth a high temperature in my daughter which turned into a week long health struggle and I have spent the past week playing nurse and doctor.
Today, the day of the Crone Moon, is the first day that I’ve had to truly unwind. My sweet girl is finally on the mend, the level of anxiety that I vibrated at this week was as intense as the Leo sun. I brought her to see a doctor, twice, and accepted the medicine that they prescribed. I am not a fan of medication and don’t easily trust the western medical system. I spent a few days in knots until I found the balance and began to utilize my natural remedies as well. The moment I began to administer coconut oil, probiotics and an ionic mouth spray my soul just fell at ease. It’s of no surprise that my daughter turned a corner within 24 hours of receiving these natural remedies. I was reminded of my energy training days, I was taught that unlike the medical system we were not to believe that it was holistic treatments or nothing, we were looking to bridge the gap between medical practice and holistic practice. I found what I needed to support my daughter as she cycles through her meds.
I reflected today, as I read a few paragraphs from Women Who Run with the Wolves, about the past week. I was so scared when my daughter’s fever wouldn’t break, I was so uncertain of the doctor that I saw, I was so unsure about trusting holistic medicine solely, I was so unsure in general. I became so panicked when other symptoms popped up throughout the week that I just couldn’t get quiet enough to listen to my gut. In all of this anxiety I was distracted from some of my decorum and began to snap a bit at my Mom and Dad, something I have strived to really resist while we are staying at their place. While being snappy is not my intended way of being, it reminded me of my wild self, my untamed inner Lioness. In my Maiden years I was unfiltered, unrestrained, unapologetic. And while being completely untamed led to some irresponsible life choices, it did hold within it fire, passion, freedom and a true wild spirit.
As the Leo Crone Moon pulls on me, she also teaches me. The Crones teach the women who bleed in the red tent, and this Leo Crone is reminding me to keep my fire alit, to speak my mind, to trust my gut and to stop avoiding other people’s reactions. I was so certain when I was younger, I had the gift of arrogant innocence and was fuelled to explain why my way was right whenever I was questioned. I have since become much quieter with age and prefer to flow, to float and to be undisturbed, this desire for a clear stream to flow down has at times watered me down and I am hearing the message of the Leo Crone loud and clear, “flow with passion, be at peace when the stream is easy and clear but also rage with destruction when the river of life bends and there are rocks to crash against.” Water is the strongest of the elements because nothing can stop her, I cannot turn into a puddle whenever an impediment presents itself.
I am here to be my full radiant self. I am here to be bold. I am here to sparkle and to shine.
When I became a mother security and safety became so important to me, I wanted to know that there was a secure home for my baby, a steady inflow of abundance to sustain us. Home and abundance were always subjects that I surrendered to Grace and just trusted, I began to loose this trust when my baby was born, for no reason other than giving birth tied me to this realm a bit stronger than before. I’ve had to work at balancing this greater degree of groundedness with a greater degree of higher awareness. My desire for security has compromised my authentic self. I have held my tongue when letting loose would have served my spirit, smiled when I felt like hissing, quietly walked away when standing my ground would have honoured my integrity.
I am so very grateful for the Leo Crone tonight, so very grateful to remember that my fire is still burning within and that I can choose to unleash my wild self whenever I choose to.
Tonight I release all of the conditioning that I have allowed to temporarily tame me. I release masks, I release civility, I relase inauthenticity. I give it all up and place it into the lap of the Leo Crone in preparation to step under the Maiden phase of the moon in a few days time.
My intention that I will plant when I am finished releasing and have come under the Maiden moon, is to learn how to be a wild mother, a wild wife, a wild homemaker, a wild writer, a wild Priestess, a wild woman in all phases of my life.
Tonight I feel the wild Crone close to my belly, I feel her lighting me up and my inner Maiden is dancing an unabashed dance of jubilation as she is awoken and released.
I hope dear sisters and brothers, that tonights Leo Crone Moon inspires you to get a little wilder too, to drop the masks and to live for the full forced expression of your true, bright, insanely Divine selves.
Grace Be With You,
Priestess of Grace,
Candise Soaring Butterfly ✨
image taken from: http://s19.photobucket.com/user/She8Art/media/more%20art/AngelWildGoddess.jpg.html